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40 Reasons Why Sobriety Doesn't Suck

Dave Frank

Chief Marketing Officer


"Sobriety really fucking sucks."

That's all I could think for a good bit of time after deciding I was going to quit drinking/using. Part of that was all the withdrawal symptoms, but a lot of it was psychological. I knew I was quitting for a reason and that it was best for me, but all the knowledge about what sobriety has given to me wasn't in my brain yet. All I had to go on was the fear and uncertainty of what life without my “best friend” would be, and all the same bullshit spouted to you by people who didn't actually know how amazing drinking and using felt. How the hell was I supposed to know what sobriety would truly give me?

That brings me here. If you're considering sobriety, struggling to keep it, or simply don't see the point in it, here's an unofficial list of things I wish I had known, that made getting clean worth it to this ex-drunk/user.

My "Things I Wish I Knew About Sobriety" List:

  1. Zero hangovers. So nice.

  2. You still make friends. You think you won't, but you will.

  3. You still have fun. You think you won't, but you will.

  4. No one actually minds that you don't drink/use anymore. Most are proud of you. They'll stick around. If they don't, they don't need to be around anyway.

  5. I actually have interesting things to suggest doing/talking about/going to, because I don't just fall back on "let's get shit-faced".

  6. I have more free time (not to be confused with having nothing to do, I now have time to explore new things).

  7. I have hobbies, interests, etc. (that I don't pawn the equipment for to fuel my habit anymore).

  8. I have saved SO. MUCH. MONEY. So many problems I used to have stemmed from always being flat broke because of my habit. You can imagine how long the list of grievances from being at $0.00 all the time is.

  9. No more trying to cover up how broke I actually was (that's the biggest giveaway people notice first).

  10. All those empty calories out the window (no joke, it was at least 10,000 calories in alcohol a week, bare minimum)!

  11. I don't look like shit anymore (my old driver's license photo was straight GOULISH).

  12. I don't physically feel like shit anymore.

  13. I don't mentally feel like shit anymore.

  14. No more constant resentment/guilt/shame/hate, given or received.

  15. I'm not a total dick to people just because I have to be sober longer than a standard work day anymore.

  16. I'm not afraid all the time. There's so much to be afraid of as an addict, it would be its own separate list to even explain it all.

  17. People can actually trust me again.

  18. People can actually depend on me again.

  19. People can actually know what version of me they're gonna get again.

  20. No more waking up in bed next to people I don't remember going to bed with.

  21. No more waking up in cars I don't remember driving.

  22. No more waking up in places I don't remember going.

  23. No more waking up with people mad at me but I don't know why.

  24. No more waking up with an empty bank account and having to study my account balance to figure out what I spent my money on.

  25. Honestly, the "waking up" list could continue for another 50 strong. You get the picture. Blackouts suck. Glad they're gone.

  26. No more paranoia and trying to figure out what everyone's "secret motives" are.

  27. No more arrests (hopefully).

  28. No more DUIs and potential to kill someone because I can't see straight past the wheel.

  29. No more disappointment and empty promises to the people I care about.

  30. No more scrounging for change to buy shitty beer/sketchy drugs.

  31. Not having to borrow/steal money to make it by day to day.

  32. Not having to borrow/steal money to make it by day to day AGAIN, because the first time you borrowed/stole money you spent it on drugs/alcohol.

  33. Avoiding #31 and #32 becoming a vicious, never-ending cycle.

  34. Not having to lie, all the time, about everything. So much lying as an addict. It's exhausting!

  35. No more hiding. Hiding from debt collectors, friends, loved ones, police, dealers I owed money to; SO much hiding.

  36. No more "balancing acts". Trying to put on a big facade so others don't worry about you, and finding a way to manage your addiction and your "normal life" at the same time.

  37. No more lowering of standards. It starts with small things, and leads to your morals and ethics just being... unbelievably compromised.

  38. Far less fights. Fights with strangers, friends, family, partners, dealers; so much fighting I get to avoid now, physical and verbal.

  39. I get to inspire other people. No matter what happens in my life, I always have the story of "the guy who could never see anything through, found a way to make the hardest change of his life". I did that. Me. I get to show people a possibility of a life they don't think they can have, and that feels so good. It's a moment of hope for them -and a reminder for me- that this is all worth it.

This list could go on for ages and it barely scratches the surface, honestly. I'm only stopping at number 40 because I don't know how many people will even make it this far. So, here it is, the biggest thing of all that I get from sobriety is:

40. I have peace. Being an addict is so tiring. Every day is just more of the same physical, mental and emotional exhaustion from living a life that destroys you, inside and out. I have peace with myself, with the people I care about, with my career, my finances, my love life, my state of mind, my goals and aspirations; I have peace. It cannot be found in the place I was, but I have it now.

Trust me, when word gets around that you went sober, they'll want to know. They'll want to know all the things that changed for you, the good, the bad, the unexpected, stuff like you read in this list today. And when they ask, you'll be able to tell them. Sobriety sucked until it didn't anymore, and when it didn't anymore, everything changed. I changed. And you absolutely can too.

You got this.


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